Q: What do you do if your horse starts bucking?
A: Raise your right arm.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Relationship 101: Rule #1
"My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends." John 15: 12-13
My thirteen year old son's aunt was graduating from college one Thursday evening and I had given him the choice to go with us to help her celebrate or to stay home. He was busy fixing up his room in hopes of getting a new computer over the weekend. He told me he was having a hard time deciding whether he wanted to go and help her celebrate or stay home and finish his project. He decided to stay home. "There are no do-overs," I said, "She will only graduate once."
I got ready to leave and when I stopped by my son's room to tell him goodbye he jumped up and told me he was going with me. "I wasn't going but when you said there were no do-overs I realized my room project would still be here tomorrow but I could never go to her graduation again."
The first thing to emphasize on any study about relationships is that relationships take time. "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends." You have to give up time to yourself to make time for others even when it is something you'd rather not do. Sometimes just being with a friend is what they need. Maybe you sit quietly while they sleep in a hospital room or you sit in the audience at a service or program where all you give to them is a hug in a receiving line or a wave from a distance giving them only the fact that you showed up. How much you give will determine the depth of your commitment to the relationship.
When my late husband was in the hospital I got a lot of phone calls from friends wanting updates and sending their best wishes but my best friend sat with me in the emergency room all night. She laid down her life for me so I would not have to go through the night alone. It wasn't comfortable. We slept in waiting room chairs. It certainly wasn't fun. I didn't feel like talking or joking or playing card games. I am sure she had a million tasks she put off to be there for me. But I can not imagine going through that without her there.
My friend and I have always been good about dropping our lives to reach out to each other in crisis but as mothers of four kids trying to find time to enjoy each others company was more of a challenge. It is important to lay down our lives for each other in crisis as well as time to build the relationship in good times. When you need a helping hand moving, or a shoulder to lean on, or child picked up during your work day, a friend lays down their life and jumps in to help. Friends help celebrate the milestones and hang out in the quiet times, too.
Rule #1 about relationships; Be there! Show up for the crises and the celebrations.
My thirteen year old son's aunt was graduating from college one Thursday evening and I had given him the choice to go with us to help her celebrate or to stay home. He was busy fixing up his room in hopes of getting a new computer over the weekend. He told me he was having a hard time deciding whether he wanted to go and help her celebrate or stay home and finish his project. He decided to stay home. "There are no do-overs," I said, "She will only graduate once."
I got ready to leave and when I stopped by my son's room to tell him goodbye he jumped up and told me he was going with me. "I wasn't going but when you said there were no do-overs I realized my room project would still be here tomorrow but I could never go to her graduation again."
The first thing to emphasize on any study about relationships is that relationships take time. "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends." You have to give up time to yourself to make time for others even when it is something you'd rather not do. Sometimes just being with a friend is what they need. Maybe you sit quietly while they sleep in a hospital room or you sit in the audience at a service or program where all you give to them is a hug in a receiving line or a wave from a distance giving them only the fact that you showed up. How much you give will determine the depth of your commitment to the relationship.
When my late husband was in the hospital I got a lot of phone calls from friends wanting updates and sending their best wishes but my best friend sat with me in the emergency room all night. She laid down her life for me so I would not have to go through the night alone. It wasn't comfortable. We slept in waiting room chairs. It certainly wasn't fun. I didn't feel like talking or joking or playing card games. I am sure she had a million tasks she put off to be there for me. But I can not imagine going through that without her there.
My friend and I have always been good about dropping our lives to reach out to each other in crisis but as mothers of four kids trying to find time to enjoy each others company was more of a challenge. It is important to lay down our lives for each other in crisis as well as time to build the relationship in good times. When you need a helping hand moving, or a shoulder to lean on, or child picked up during your work day, a friend lays down their life and jumps in to help. Friends help celebrate the milestones and hang out in the quiet times, too.
Rule #1 about relationships; Be there! Show up for the crises and the celebrations.
Monday, May 09, 2011
My Riding Journal- May 9, 2011
The best move I ever made was to change my regular schedule-- instead of riding after all my work was done I decided to ride first, then ranch work. Amazing how much I can accomplish after a ride and actually get my ride in because I am not too exhausted to ride. Thus, got a nice ride in today during the cool of the morning on my grand-horse, Apache. Our first ever ride, went well. I had heard he can be a little stubborn and I did have to use my encouraging stick to keep our transition smooth but he was amazingly willing to try to figure out what I wanted.
I made our first ride short and sweet. We worked on walk-trot transitions and once he got his balance and realized I meant it he kept quite steady. Additionally, my goal was tempo. He seemed very concerned about the tall grass and the dog playing nearby but relaxed when I counted cadence at both the walk and the trot. Eventually, he relaxed and kept an even tempo when I didn't count out loud.
Our transitions, which were quite rough at first, became smooth and more balanced as we practiced on the short sides. Tracking left I would prepare him with a little jiggle just before M, ask at M, and up my phases until I got a trot. At first he balked, stepping up into the trot on cue but only taking a step or two and then acting as if he crashed into a wall (I assume it was the bit he was fighting with). Not sure if he was used to riding with close contact on the bit. I practiced a few times giving him the reins and letting him move forward until he was comfortable with a little more contact during the transition. With a little encouragement from the crop, we began getting transitions on cue, with a steady tempo, and a continuous trot along the short sides until I asked for a walk at H. Repeating again preparing with the jiggle at K, asking at K, and on this side a little reminder at the gate, A, to keep him from stopping at the gate. Sometimes a little more encouragement at the quarter-line to get him to continue the trot around the corner until I asked him to walk at F. Of course, we repeated the exercise tracking right: preparing just before F and H, asking at F and H, and transitioning to the walk at M and K.
The trot to walk transitions were a little troublesome although we had several good ones. Many of them were before I asked or taking too long to respond. I suppose I need to use a little more rein but then he would do a dead stop. Which by the way his walk down the centerline to a halt at X, was very nice, on cue and fairly straight.
Thoughts for next time: work more on the walk-trot transitions and trot-walk transitions. Continue working on steady, tempo at both gaits and work on straight lines and adding circles to practice the bend. Apache needs a lot of saddle time to build up his balance. He was tripping all over the place and losing his balance and stumbling. I don't think it is from his foot because I see him playing and having no problem in the pasture. My guess is he is just not used to carrying a rider and needs to build up some new muscles and balance. One reason I'll keep our rides short this week.
INTRO OBJECTIVES (USDF):
I made our first ride short and sweet. We worked on walk-trot transitions and once he got his balance and realized I meant it he kept quite steady. Additionally, my goal was tempo. He seemed very concerned about the tall grass and the dog playing nearby but relaxed when I counted cadence at both the walk and the trot. Eventually, he relaxed and kept an even tempo when I didn't count out loud.
Our transitions, which were quite rough at first, became smooth and more balanced as we practiced on the short sides. Tracking left I would prepare him with a little jiggle just before M, ask at M, and up my phases until I got a trot. At first he balked, stepping up into the trot on cue but only taking a step or two and then acting as if he crashed into a wall (I assume it was the bit he was fighting with). Not sure if he was used to riding with close contact on the bit. I practiced a few times giving him the reins and letting him move forward until he was comfortable with a little more contact during the transition. With a little encouragement from the crop, we began getting transitions on cue, with a steady tempo, and a continuous trot along the short sides until I asked for a walk at H. Repeating again preparing with the jiggle at K, asking at K, and on this side a little reminder at the gate, A, to keep him from stopping at the gate. Sometimes a little more encouragement at the quarter-line to get him to continue the trot around the corner until I asked him to walk at F. Of course, we repeated the exercise tracking right: preparing just before F and H, asking at F and H, and transitioning to the walk at M and K.
The trot to walk transitions were a little troublesome although we had several good ones. Many of them were before I asked or taking too long to respond. I suppose I need to use a little more rein but then he would do a dead stop. Which by the way his walk down the centerline to a halt at X, was very nice, on cue and fairly straight.
Thoughts for next time: work more on the walk-trot transitions and trot-walk transitions. Continue working on steady, tempo at both gaits and work on straight lines and adding circles to practice the bend. Apache needs a lot of saddle time to build up his balance. He was tripping all over the place and losing his balance and stumbling. I don't think it is from his foot because I see him playing and having no problem in the pasture. My guess is he is just not used to carrying a rider and needs to build up some new muscles and balance. One reason I'll keep our rides short this week.
INTRO OBJECTIVES (USDF):
- forward with steady tempo in all gaits
- elastic contact with independent hands (light, steady contact except during freewalk)
- correctly balanced seat
- proper geometry of figures
- straightlines on rail and down centerline
- correct bends in corners and circles
- 20m circles @ working trot rising
- 20m circle developing canter in first quarter of circle
- smooth transitions
- working trot rising to halt through walk
- halt to working trot rising
- working trot rising to med walk
- med walk to working trot rising
- med walk to free walk
- free walk to med walk
- working trot rising to canter
- canter to working trot rising
Sunday, May 01, 2011
A Circle of Wagons for You
You can not circle the wagons with just one wagon. Even two wagons can not provide protection from attacks in all directions. If you are not in fellowship with other believers, you are leaving yourself and your family open to attack on all sides.
Who are the travelers in your wagon community that are traveling alongside you. Who is it that you are doing life together with? Are you sharing your resources including gifts and talents with each other? Do you have a strong community that can circle around and provide a barrier for each other in times of attack?
If you are like a lot of us who are traveling down this road too fast, too busy, and too distracted by a string of trivial pursuits you may be saying, "I don't have enough wagons in my group to protect us on all sides." If that is you, then it is time to get out and build up your wagon train again. Building a community of strong friendships and fellowship takes time and effort. For some of us who are not super outgoing socially it can seem like an insurmountable task. A strong community of believers helps minimize attacks and gives you the advantage when you are attacked.
Over the next few posts I am going to offer some ideas on how to go about building up strong relationships and meaningful friendships that can eventually lead to a stronger community that you can do life together with.
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