Teenage Wisdom

I am always perplexed by the insights I gain from my teenage children. I was thinking about how hyper-sensitive they are to what other people think about them. If a teenager, and I am not naming names, doesn't have the proper attire that is a cause to skip school. You can not go to class if your new. You can't go to class if you've worn your only clean shirt already once this year unless its your absolute favorite and then you can wear that up to three times a week but not four or five. You can't go to class unless you drive a cool car or truck and if you have to have a ride from your parent-- you can only go if you get to drive up to the school or are dropped off at a friends so you can ride the rest of the way with them.

As I contemplated how to offer wisdom to my teenager about learning not to be so hyper-sensitive about what others thought something that took me two decades to get over, I realized the hypersensitivity did not seem to carry over onto what I thought about him. Okay, so maybe if you could take a little bit of the "I don't care what you think, mom" and apply that to your peers maybe you could reach a healthy balance.

Teenagers also have a strange sense of math. You can tell them how great they are for five days in a row with little response but if one day after school you ask them to pick up their mess they equate, "You never have anything good to say. All you do is yell at me when I mess up."

You would have thought I was never a teenager. But I was and that is why I probably act like I do now. Somehow I think every parent wants to protect their adolescents from going through what they did, if only they just did what we did right without doing what we did wrong--- then maybe they would be better adults than we are or at least better quicker. My daughter once yelled at me, "You just want me to be like you were as a teenager--- well I am not you, mom." The dilemna-- do I tell her? The last thing I wanted was for her to be like I was as a teenager but unfortunately I saw so much of me in her it was scarey. Well, I think she might turn out okay afterall!!

God's Glory

I just learned that the Hebrew word for "Glory" has a more fine-tuned translation than what we commonly consider splendor or greatness. The word is kavodh and means inclusively weight (or more modernly great treasure), abundance, and wealth.

"Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory (the great treasure, abundance, and wealth) of God the Father."

Interesting isn't it. Jesus brought Glory to God the Father. In otherwords, he was a great treasure to him. Jesus was God's wealth and abundance. That is why we want to be like Jesus to be a great treasure and of great wealth to God. "So whatever you do , do it all for the glory of God (1 Cor 10:31)." Do it all to be God's abundance and wealth. In all that you do be a great treasure to God.

"For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also (Matthew 6:21)." Following the logic here, if you are God's treasure--- will not God's own heart be with you also?

Meeting With God

It's a new year and I just learned that God wants to meet with me! From the very beginning of mankind, God walked with us and talked with us and even looked for us when we were hiding because of sin. He asked us to design special places to meet with us and cleansed us so that He could dwell among us.
"... Make a sanctuary for me and I will dwell among you. Make this tabernacle and all its furnishings exactly like the pattern I will show you. " Exodus 25:8-9

I wonder: what is the pattern that God is showing us for his sanctuary today. Where does God want to meet you? What does the pattern of place, time, and furnishings look like? Will you run to this place knowing God is going to meet with you there?

Think about how you react if you hear your phone ringing-- not even knowing who it is, do you leap over small furniture and stumble over toys trying to catch the caller before they hang up? If there is a knock at the door, do you find the energy to get up out of bed, put on your robe, to see who is there? God is waiting for you at your special meeting place will you not find the energy to get up and to leap over small furniture to meet with him before he leaves. Would you miss a minute of his visit with you?

New Every Morning

Lord, I will wait for you.
You, Lord, are my portion.
Great is your faithfulness.
Your compassion is new every morning.
Your compassion never fails.
I will not be consumed.
Great is your love.

Good Fruit

"You can not change the fruit itself but you can change the root from whence the tree nourishes the fruit it produces." When I heard this a light came on in this wee little brain of mine. No wonder it seems impossible to change our bad habits or bad attitudes or bad tempers. We try to practice better habits, have better attitudes, and present more pleasant temperaments by polishing the appearance of the fruit. But bad fruit is bad fruit no matter how shiney you try to make it.
The only way to make bad fruit better is to nourish the root system that produces it. Build stronger roots that eliminates the need for improving bad fruit because wouldn't you know it the fruit it produces is good. The roots of true joy and happiness are naturally displayed in the fruit we produce. The good fruit is good habits, good attitudes, and pleasant temperments.
In Joel Osteen's book, Your Best Life Now, he encourages us to improve the root system by looking at the roots that produced the bad fruit. What is your purpose for not stopping a bad habit? What is the underlying reason you exhibit a bad temper or bad attitude? Once you know, don't hang on to that thing-- forgive a hurt, stop seeking pity, eliminate a fear--- whatever the reason deal with it and move on. Your life will begin producing good fruit as your root system becomes healthier and stops wasting nourishment on the bitterness of the past.

Hosea 14

Bring your confessions, and return to the Lord... and the Lord will say, "I will heal you of your faithlessness; my love will know no bounds, for my anger will be gone forever."

He promises to be like:
a refreshing dew from heaven

That falling on us will make us:
blossom like the lilly
send deep roots into the soil
branch out like olive trees
with fragrance as the cedars
We will live:
under God's shade
and
flourish like grain
blossom like grapevines
with fragrance of the wines

God answers your prayers and cares for you.
God is a tree that is always green
All fruit comes from him.

The wise listen with discrenment
and
righteous people walk in the true and right paths of the Lord.

The Lord says,
"I am the one who answers your prayers and cares for you."

To Do Life Today List!

To Do Life List:
____ Expect God's favor today... no matter your age, your health, or your circumstances.
____ Visualize your big dream and imagine living it at least twice today.
____ Write down the Top 6 things you want to accomplish today and do them.
____ Take one step toward your big dream today.
____ Read a scripture and think about it as you interact with the world today.
____ Be ready to be used by God today--- you're on-call 24/7.
____ Accumlate 30 minutes of heart-pumping activity today.
____ Think about the things you put in your fuel tank today (your body).
____ Think about the impact of the things that came out of your mouth today.
____ Work a puzzle daily to keep your mind alert (use it or lose it).
____ Read a chapter from a book today and journal what it meant to you.
____ Write down 10 Great things that happened to you today.
____ Thank God for today.

The Hard Decisions

Last evening my 17 year-old son and I watched a program on Leadership delivered by speaker, Chris Widener. He recommended that leaders make hard decisions quickly so that if you make the wrong decision you have more time to fix it and if you make the right decision you have more time to implement it. As my son and I discussed that, we realized a key contribution to our most heated conflicts-- he likes to make quick decisions which I always felt were impulsive and I like to analyze the details and make the right decision the first time which he felt was my procrastinating so I could hold him back.
During the conversation I did realize that I have a fear of making the wrong decision. I have an underlying need to be RIGHT! And so I put off a decision until it is certain to be the right one. The freedom to make the wrong decision with time to correct it may be just what I need.
The best part was the look on my son's face when he learned that he had a quality of great leadership. He loved to 'make hard decisions quickly.' We both recognized that we had a different way to approach a decision and that somewhere in middle we could come together. He could give me a little more time to gather the facts and I could make a decision a little sooner even if it was wrong.

Heart's Desires

I read a 2004 Cover Story from Time Magazine today about the discovery of the "faith gene." According to the author there is a gene sequence in our DNA that predisposes us to seek God. In Sacred Romance author John Eldredge posits that God placed in our hearts passions and desires that are designed to lead us back to him. "Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart (Psalm 37:4, NLT)."

We are hard-wired to seek after God and he gave us what we need, our heart's desires to find him. "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD (Jeremiah 29:13-14, NLT). "

Of course we have the gift of free will and can use our hard-wire desires to pursue selfish delight and not find God. What a shame to miss out on having the desires of your heart and God too!

In Wild at Heart, Eldredge proposes that a man's heart's desires can be summed up into three categories: A battle to fight, an adventure to live, and a Beauty to rescue. Similarly he lists three essential desires in the feminine heart: to be fought for, to be swept up into an adventure, and to unveil her Beauty. What are your heart's desires? Do you agree with Eldredge? What desires has God put in your heart to help you find him? Are you pursuing them, for his delight or your own, or are you burying them?

The Car from Hell? or Heaven?

I really thought God had let me down after the same car from my God's Peace post exploded just three days after he got it and my son had to replace the entire engine not to mention hundreds of dollars of other things wrong with it. He had that replaced and then the instrument cluster quit working. A few days after getting it back from the mechanic he was stranded on the side of the road when his tire came off the rim. Is this the car from hell or what!!
I have been having conversations with God about this whole car ordeal. Did I not ask for a sign? Was that not you God that gave me a sign? The sign I testified about as your faithful witness while everyone watched and smirked and jeered, "What a peice of junk!" I prayed about this car purchase because I wanted your blessing-- what happened to your promise-- 'ask and you shall receive.' I did ask and this is what I get? I just felt stupid and publicly humiliated not to mention let down by God.
Last night my son came into my room and cheerfully told me he had fixed the tire. He was very proud of himself and happy that it wasn't going to cost him any more money to get it fixed. But he informed me that there was something wrong and the car was now making a knocking sound. Sigh! Now what? And the conversations and feelings of God letting me down again filled my head. When I walked by the garage, I heard my son and my nephew laughing. I peeked in and my son was bent over with his head in the engine compartment of his new but very old car. He was covered with dirt and grease from head to toe, wrench in hand, tinkering.
"Hey, mom," he looked up, "I think we figured it out." I smiled and left.
Could it be I just didn't get it? Was this God's plan all along? Since the car's engine exploded, my son has been at home working for me on the ranch almost every night to make up for the extra money to fix the car's engine. He has been in the garage tinkering with the engine, painting rusted parts, and affixing parts that are falling off. He's decided he really likes working on cars and is thinking about becoming a mechanic. His grades have been improving in school so he can participate in the technical college program as a senior in high school. Maybe the extra investment I had to make in the car is just what God ordered to keep him at home, safe, and tinkering in the garage.
"After I get you paid back, I am going repaint this car and redo the interior. It's gonna be a classic."
"Sure," I replied, "The car from heaven."
He smiled. "Exactly."

Mastery over the Previous Age

"The fact distinguishing our day from previous times is obviously our mastery over the scientific means of life. ... [new discovery] harnessed for our service until we possess, as no other previous age, [a greater means of living]. ... But when we turn our thought from the means by which we live to the ends for which we live, are we so sure that we are on a correspondingly higher level than our [fore] fathers?"
---excerpted from The Hope of the World by Harry Emerson Fosdick (1933).

FULL FAITH

Faith is being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you can not see (Hebrews 11)

Have FAITH.

Goodness is virture, excellence, generousity, value.

Add GOODNESS to your FAITH.

Knowledge is familiarity, a knowing, acquintance with facts, awareness, and the path of understanding.

Add KNOWLEDGE to your GOODNESS.

Self-control is like a city whose walls are fortified, to regulate, direct, or influence.

Add SELF-CONTROL to your KNOWLEDGE.

Perseverance is adherence to a course of action, belief, or purpose through suffering and trials.

Add PERSEVERANCE to your SELF-CONTROL.

Godliness is a great reverance for God, valuing all things from the creator, attained by knowledge and truth.

Add GODLINESS to your PERSEVERANCE.

Brotherly Kindness is exercising a tender, considerate, helping nature toward each other.

Add BROTHERLY KINDNESS to your GODLINESS.

Love is patient, kind, without envy or boasting, not proud, keeps no record of wrongs, rejoices in truth, protects, trusts, always hopes, always perseveres, never fails.

Add LOVE to your BROTHERLY KINDNESS.

Have FAITH full of Goodness, Knowledge, Self-control, Perseverance, Godliness, Brotherly Kindness, and Love.

Connor's Financial Planning

Connor said, "Mom, I realize that you are not going to increase the amount of my commissions. I understand that. Really, I am okay with that but can you at least increase the frequency of them?"

God's Peace

God promised he would be the Father to the Fatherless. I really caught on to that promise when my husband died and left my children fatherless. Yesterday, God really showed me his faithfulness. My son had worked all summer at the local grocery store and most of his hard-earned money had went straight into the gas tank of his dad's old pickup. I had agreed to help him buy a used car that would save him money on gas and allow him to put more of his money towards his insurance and hopefully have some spending money leftover as he paid me back for the car. He researched several cars and had taken my advice to not buy a couple of them. Then he found "The Perfect car."
I was not so sure. It was a little too sports car for me, not necessarily the gas saver I was hoping for, and I was not so sure it would handle safely in the snow. My biggest concern was that it was a sporty car and that he would drive it too fast. I started doing my research online and kept running into younger men who had bought these cars with their dads. I thought, yeah, this is the kind of car that would be cool for him to buy with his dad. I just didn't feel comfortable saying yes to this car... I mean what if something happens to him! What if he drives it too fast and gets hurt? I just didn't have a peace about it. I decided to tell him to find something else.
I went home last night and told him I decided it wasn't the right car. He tried to convince me it was. He said he did research and the mid-engine rear wheel drive he'd found handled well in the snow and it got 36 MPG in the city. I wasn't convinved my research showed that it only got 24MPG in the city and didn't handle as well in the snow. He said that I must have been looking at the GT's which were V6's. We had conflicting information and reviews. We kicked it around and I finally said, "Fine, you offer them $1000 cash and tell them we'll pick it up tonight." He tried to tell me how it was worth the $1895 they were asking and that I hadn't considered the stereo system and that other cars like it were on autotrader for a lot more.
I explained that I never agreed to buy him a stereo system and that just because they were asking for more in these ads didn't mean they were going to get it. Reluctantly he agreed to call and make an offer of $1100. They said they could go to $1750 or $1200 without the stereo.
A used stereo system for $550. Oh my son said, it is worth more than that you've never research stereos. I reemphasised 'not buying you a stereo.' I reconfirmed my position that the car was only worth $1009 according to TMV. He correctly stated that was an average and this car is worth so much more than that plus its got a great stereo. I finally agreed that I would allow him to buy it for the amount I had originally offered to help him out with which was $1500. And I prayed that I was not making a mistake.
"Lord, you promised to be the father to the fatherless. I don't know how to make this decision. Am I being too protective? Or am I making a big mistake. I am asking you to show me the right way. Do not let them accept this offer of $1500 if it is not a good idea, if it is not something you as his father would endorse. If you agree he should have this car then please protect him and help him to avoid the temptations to drive wrecklessly. Lord, I am looking for your answer by the outcome of this deal."
My son called and said, "If we bring $1500 cash tonight will you take the offer." No but they would accept, "$1600 if we came down tonight only." I said no.
Oh boy did we have a big fight after that. My son couldn't believe I would blow the whole deal for just $100. I said, "They will call back and if they don't it wasn't meant to be. We agreed $1500 and I really don't have the other hundred."
"Someone else is going to buy this car."
"I am telling you this is the game. You made a fair offer. It's $500 more than the TMV, that is plenty of money for that stereo. It's a fair offer. The $100 will go into the pocket of the one who stands their ground the longest. If it is sold out from under you, there is a reason and you don't want it anyway."
He was so angry with me. I told him to call him back and ask the salesman to take his name and number and call him back if they changed their mind. Soon I was on the phone with the salesman trying to convince me to buy the car for $1600. I said, "Listen, I did some research on line the TMV for that car is $1009. That means we've offered you $500 already for the stereo which is also used."
"But this car is a classic."
"You mean it has $134,000 miles on it."
"The stereo is worth $900."
"Listen, we have researched this car and feel that the $1500 is a fair price."
"We have more in the car than that. We paid $1400 for it."
"We are offering $1500 cash tonight. If you can't take that for it, I understand. Call us if you change your mind. Good night."
We hung up. My son couldn't believe I did that. I didn't mention to him that I was pretty set on the fact that if God said yes, they would come down to $1500 and that I wasn't going a penny over that and buy this car without God's blessing.
He went on and on about the extra $100. He couldn't believe I was going to let someone else get this great deal for $100. He told me how many ways he could come up with the extra money and I told him that is how you were going to come up with the $1500. I said, If you have $1600 march right on down there and get the car.
I took the opportunity to teach him a few things about buying cars. Number one, you can't be so set on getting one that you convince yourself this is the only car in the world for you. Number two, it's a game. Whose pocket should the $100 go into? Decide what you want to give for the car and be willing to walk away and find a better deal if they can't sell it to you for that. I feel $1500 is more than fair and I am not going to let them play me for another $100. And if they can't sell it for that-- that's fine too. There is another deal out there.
I don't think I had convinved my son until the phone rang about thirty minutes later and they said if we had $1500 in cash, tonight, we had a deal. I prayed on the way to the bank -- this is really from you right Lord? The sign at the drive up window said checks for over $1500 had to be done in person in the Lobby. Luckily we only needed $1500 because the lobby was closed.
He got his car--- I got God's peace~

I'm the Leader!

I am a great leader. The only thing holding me back is that no one wants to follow.

Puppy Love

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made." Psalm 139:13-14

Yesterday I went in to wake my 9 year old by teasing, "Okay-- rise and call me blessed." You know from Proverbs 31 her children rise and call her blessed. Like that is ever gonna happen in my house. Guess what, he grinned and said, "You are blessed mom." That made my day! These moments of unexpected bliss are why I went through the hassle of birthing him, loving him, worrying about him, disciplining him, teaching him, and footing the bill for him.

God is love and he created us to share that love. Maybe it is the same way in which we decide to get a puppy, because we want some living being to express love to. What better subject than a puppy who expects nothing from you. I guess that is why we have babies, too. Because we love to express our love and we imagine these tiny infants cuddling in our arms smiling up at us. Of course, it doesn't take long for reality to hit. Just like with the puppy who starts chewing up everything you own, kids soon learn to talk and "I love you" isn't always at the top of their vocabulary list. By two they don't seem to idolize you as much as they once did. Once they start school, you no longer know everything. When they become teenagers, you no longer know anything. Expressing our love for them becomes extremely challenging.

Children aren't going to praise us just because we went through birthing pains to have them and all sorts of pains to raise them. However, It doesn't change the fact that we love them. We did not choose to have them so they could worship us. We wanted to love them. We loved them first ... we love them always... through it all. And if things work out right, they can carry that love with them throughout their lives when they feel like no one else in the world cares. Unselfish love endures forever in the hearts of those who recieve it.

Loving first, without expectation of love in return is what unconditional love is all about. It is why your puppy is so happy because he expects nothing. He bounces up to you for a pat or a scratch behind the ears and if he doesn't get one he doesn't mope off. Instead he bounces off somewhere else and tries again later. But if he does get a pat or a scatch he is filled with tail-wagging excitement. Everything he receives is a blessing over and above what he expected. In this same way we should reach out and love others with the heart of a puppy's love; no expectations. Giving love should be the goal that brings us joy and the return of that unexpected love, a blessing over and above our expectations.

"Remembering the words of the Lord Jesus himself said, "It is more blessed to give than to receive." Acts 20:35

Hope for the Control Freak

I have been called a control freak a few times. Okay, maybe I don't work that well with others and maybe my eye for details is a few sizes larger than the average person's but control freak? Whatever. However, in the remote case I lean toward being a control freak I heard on the radio this morning that the Sunflower Dental Group will let me be in control. Isn't that great! They even have a back up plan. They said, "We'll let you be in control and if that doesn't work there is always laughing gas."

~"Laughing gas," hope for the control freak~

Pampered Pets

All I can say is city pets must be really whimpy. I just read a Reader's Digest article on keeping your pets bug-free. They suggest if your dog gets a tick to remove it and take the dog to the veternarian to analyze the bite area. I am pretty sure my vet and my dog would not be on speaking terms by the end of the summer. And frankly, I wouldn't be talking to my vet either because I would be in the soup line ... broke from those daily trips to the vet. Country dogs however do get ticks. So if we see 'em we'll yank 'em out but if not the ticks tend to fill up and fall off on their own. If they fall on the ground, we stomp 'em and watch the explosion. Do not stomp them if they land on the deck or the patios because blood stains! We are not heartless though, if the dog does get a lump or infection from a tick bite we clean the infected area with an anti-bacterial wash. We also load the dogs up with tick spot prevention goop to cut down on their chances of getting a tick in the first place.

A Heart for God

Many of us spend a lot of time wondering what God's purpose is for our lives. We take inventories and interest surveys to find our God given talents and gifts. We pray for answers about what job, what ministry, and what schools God has planned for us and our families. At times it feels like we are lost because the answers seem unclear... do you think God may have just wanted you to choose? But we know the feeling of being in God's sweet spot... that place where we know we are walking on the good path God has laid out for us. We continue to search for that spot and prayerfully ask God to continue to nudge us back on it. So what does God want from us? I beleive all he wants is our heart.
There are over 774 references to heart in scriptures, some versions boast 996 references. There are hearts being hardened, filled with pain, drawn to others, rejoicing, and sinking. There are evil hearts and glad hearts. God speaks and prays in his heart. You can find out a lot about God's heart and the heart of man in the scriptures. I search his word to find out exactly what God wants from us. It became very clear God does not want us to go through the motions of being righteous, he wants us to give him our hearts fully.
Here is a little heart to do list straight from God's word:

• Fix these words on your heart (Deut 11:18)
• Love him with all your heart (Deut 30:6)
• Yield your heart to the Lord (Josh 21:3)
• Return to the Lord with all your heart (1 Sam 7:3)
• Your hearts must be fully committed to the Lord (1 Sam 8:61)
• Pour out your hearts to him for God is our refuge (Psalm 62:8)
• Open wide your hearts (2 Cor 6:13)
• Let Christ dwell in your hearts through faith (Eph 3:17)
• Let the peace of God guard your heart in Christ (Phil 4:7)
• Set your hearts on things above (Col 3:1)
• Let the Peace of Christ rule in your heart (Col 3:15)
• Purify your hearts (James 4:8)
• Set apart Christ as Lord in your heart (1 Peter 3:5)
• Apply your heart to understanding (Proverbs 2)
• Keep his commands in your heart (Proverbs 3)
• Trust in the Lord with all your heart (Proverbs 3)

This is just a sample of God's heart to do list. If you find more please share them in the comment section. These are God's will and purpose for your lives! Rejoice in your heart for the Lord will make your paths straight when you search for his discretion and understanding like a hidden treasure.

Inside Looking Out

I have been stuck in this head of mine looking out for as long as I can ever remember. Sometimes I just want to get out of my head and get a bigger picture of the world. I have to wonder if I were blind and deaf would I still feel as if the center of my existence was inside my head or would I have a more over-all body experience. I forget sometimes that I am getting older on the outside which changes the way others look at me but not necessarily the way I look out at others. The nucleus of my life view seems the same as when I was even nine years old or younger. I have more experiences in my head now but I still peer out from behind this same set of eyes. From that perspective nothing has changed, I'm still in my head peering out at the world. Age has only changed the way I process what I experience, making some things simpler to understand and others more complex. Yet, it's still me, the same girl that was peering out decades ago; still here on the inside looking out.